Wednesday, April 19, 2017

Have you ever?

(disclaimer: This is a departure from my usual positive posts, not due my having issues currently, but rather to share that I have been there)

Have you ever spent a day holding on to the grass in your yard in an attempt to not get thrown off the planet?

Have you ever vomited so much for so long, it hurt to think about vomiting again?

Have you ever had the dim light of the daytime, shining though a blanket, scorch your eyes to tears?

Have ever squeezed your eyelids closed so tight your eyeballs hurt?

Have you ever had the sound of a light switch being turned off be painful?

Have you ever wished people would just leave you alone in your misery?

Have you ever lived in fear of something you have no control over?

Have you ever wondered, "why me?"

Have you ever wished for your old life back?

Have you ever lashed out at the ones closest to you because you didn't know what else to do?

Have you ever pushed on, in spite of being miserable, because you had no other option?

Have you ever begged to die?

I have.

'til next time


Just a guy trying to live with an invisible, potentially debilitating illness

1 comment:

  1. Honestly wish I could say it gets better, but just being diagnosed with Meniere's, this is all new to me. Finding out that while walking, instead of always looking ahead, if I continually look at ground, only looking up to be sure that I'm not about to hit anything, I'm ok. Of course, that only works in my yard. We'll see. Woke up with horrible pain in my right ear this morning. Looks to be another day being out of work. Almost feels as if ear is about to bleed, will honestly know when (or if) it happens.